Entertaining Children

We’ve had occasion recently to be entertaining my nephews on a more regular basis.  It has been lovely to see all the wonderful social interactions growing between my two girls (3yo & 5yo) and the two boys (3yo and 4yo).  Lots of wonderful sharing, communicating and of course the occasional tears and tantrums.

Right now it is winter and playing outside is not really possible – our backyard does not cater well to wet / cold weather play and I don’t have enough seats in the car or the mental fortitude to take all the children to the park/playground on my own.

Here are some things that I’ve found really help when entertaining young children.  This is probably stuff everyone already knows but I find it really helps me to write this stuff down in my blog and sort of formalise it in my brain.  Plus any comments on how I can improve or make more fun play dates are always welcome.

I like to be prepared and have play areas set out, similar to Kindergartens / PreSchools / Childcare.    I also have learnt that you don’t need to put out ALL the toys eg we don’t need ALL the dressups, a small portion of dress ups will suffice, especially if you can theme them (ie doctors, ballerinas, pirates etc).

Here is our loungeroom and kitchen all set up for a recent playdate:

Home Corner

Musical Instruments and Dolls House

Hospital area

Reading corner

Colouring in area

Setting everything up like this makes for a much easier clean up afterwards, especially if I get my girls to help set up because then they know how things get put away also.

I try to have one play area per child and one extra play area.   Note the home corner is set up ON the treadmill.  I’ve found if you put a box of toys on the treadmill the children are less likely to jump on the treadmill and try to play with it.  Simple solution to a problem.

I also try to get most of my housework out of the way before our guests arrive, it is very difficult to mediate a disagreement if your hands are full of sudsy dishes.  If I can’t get the housework finished then I hide it out of the way where it wont be nagging me all day (ie i lock mount to-be-folded in my bedroom).

Ground rules are best laid out at the beginning of the visit and reinforced subtly throughout the visit by praising the good behaviour.  Bad behaviour merits a warning and if repeated a time out (1 minute for each year of their age).  Laying the rules out at the beginning of the visit usually means the parent of your visiting child is aware also.

Heidi simply gets removed from the environment if she misbehaves as her tantrums are usually caused by over stimulation, removal to a quiet room and some calm rocking to and fro whilst being held tightly really helps her to unwind, then I can leave her to play alone until she is ready to rejoin the others.  This is one of our trickier things to deal with if there is more than two children present because you can guarantee the longer I’m away with Heidi the more likely we are to have a blow up from the others.

I try to stay visible to the children, sitting on the floor reading a book in the same room as them.  Being a visible presence helps to reinforce good behaviour and it means I’m on hand to praise them or mediate disputes as necessary.  If they want me to join in then I can, otherwise the kiddies can play and learn to socialise with their peers.

Snacks / meals – I try to have a good idea in advance what I’m going to do.  Water suffices for drinks.  Once upon another lifetime I tried to bake cookies and get all fancy, but that is all too much like hardwork and vegemite sandwiches and fruit pieces /  veggie sticks are much easier with the occasional chips or fruit bar treat (plus less clean up after).  Thanks to Aussie Farmers Direct and their wonderful fruit and veg boxes this has been made a whole heap easier.

If I know it is only going to be two children (eg one nephew and one daughter) then I might try to introduce a sharing game such as Bounce Bounce Tigger or Connect Four.  Or try to get them involved in helping to prepare the snack or meal.  It really depends how I’m feeling on the day, tired and cranky Marita means less life lessons and more free play, energetic and enthused Marita means more involvement and attempts to teach socialisation skills.

Messy play is for days when I have another adult around because I simply can not cope with the clean up on my own.

TV time is held for emergencies or when I need to leave the room for a long period of time (ie to prepare snacks).  I try to limit TV time to a short one episode of a TV show on DVD and I try to tie it into some of the other play activities I’ve got lined up.  For the recent playdate I showed the pictures of I used a Playsongs DVD which encouraged the children to make up their own band using the musical instruments we had out.

I do try to set up one play area to reflect what is going on in the kids life – the hospital corner reflects the childrens recent experience with granddad in hospital.  A while back we played ‘Schools’.  If possible I put out books that revolve around that theme also.

And the final three really important lessons.

1. Silence is NOT golden, silence means that something really really bad is happening and you’d best get your rear end into where the children are pronto.

2. Don’t sweat the small stuff, be relaxed and calm and the children will follow your lead.

3. Have fun.